Sarcastiholic

The Chicago Bears Are Not Helping My Self-Image

It’s the midway point of the 2010 NFL Season and time to take a long, cold, hard look at the team. For those of you with a weak constitution, you should be warned. It isn’t pretty.

Right now, the Bears are 4 – 4 (.500), having lost 3 of the last four games. Two of those games were blowouts. Additionally, the Bears only have one win against a team with a winning record, Pittsburgh.

Apparently, the “Any Given Sunday” rule was in effect that day. It didn’t hurt that the Steelers were missing Troy Polamalu and that Jeff Reed missed two very makeable field goals.

The other three wins were against Seattle (3 – 5), Detroit (1 – 7), and Cleveland (1 – 7). These teams are currently in the bottom depths of the NFL. Wins against these teams are not to be lauded. Even more unfortunate, is that Chicago is not very far away from being one of these teams.

Last Sunday, the once proud Bears’ defense allowed over 180 yards on the ground. This was done by the Arizona Cardinals who had the second worst running game heading into the ninth week. Oh, yeah. While that was going on, Kurt Warner also burned the secondary for 5 touchdown passes while going a perfect 6 for 6 on third down conversions in the first half.

Go ahead and throw up. I know I did.

The terrible truth to all of this is that the Chicago Bears are not a good football team. This is the third year removed from a Super Bowl appearance, and we are getting progressively worse due to bad drafts, mismanagement of personnel, bad play calling, and what appears to be apathy by the current roster.

So the question remains, how can this be fixed? In the short term, I do not believe it can. The long term solutions range all over the field. Many are calling for the head coach and general manager to be replaced. This is not going to happen. Whether it should happen or not, is beyond the point at this present time or even next season. Jerry Angelo and Lovie Smith are not going to be replaced next season. The cost in dollars against the guaranteed contract extensions that these two signed prohibits that move by a franchise as thrifty as the Chicago Bears.

Additionally, there is still the threat of a holdout/walkout/strike (whatever you want to call it) next season if the NFL and Player’s Union can not strike out a new deal. The Bears will not pay Angelo and/or Smith for the remainder of their contracts, then go out and have to spend the same amount to hire a new coach and/or general manager and then watch them sit for a year while the NFL and Player’s Union try and hammer out a new agreement. The Bears would be paying two general managers and two head coaches for one season, while bringing in no new revenue. This is not going to happen.

So, it would like look like the Bears have Angelo and Smith for at least another year, if not longer. This still leaves us with the following questions:

What can we do to stop sucking this season?

How can we stop ourselves from sucking next season and the year after that?

First off, this season is not completely gone. I am not drinking the Lovie Smith kool-aid. This is a fact. The fact is that the Bears could still make a wild card spot with a 10 – 6 record. The Bears can only lose two more games this year because a 9 – 7 record will not get a wild card spot in the NFC.

If they win six of the next eight games, they have a shot at the playoffs. After that, who knows what can happen. Ask the 9 – 7 Cardinals if the impossible can happen. They came within 45 seconds of winning a Super Bowl nobody thought they could get to last season against one of the best defenses this league has seen in years.

Can the Bears win 6 out of their next eight games? Yes. But it will not be easy. The Bears have games left against St. Louis and Detroit. After that, it is not going to be pretty. The have upcoming games against San Francisco, Philadelphia, Green Bay, Baltimore, and two against Minnesota.

They could get four wins from San Francisco, St. Louis, Green Bay, and Detroit. None of these teams have winning records right now. Green Bay will be playing in Chicago and the Bears can win that game. That would leave two wins needed against Philadelphia, Baltimore, and Minnesota. It should be noted that the second Minnesota game is in week 16 at Chicago. There is a good chance that the Vikings will have the division sealed up by then, and maybe even their conference spot sewed up. The Bears could be facing a lackluster Vikings team with nothing to prove and steal a win.

In other words, there is a lot that has to happen for the Bears to get a wild card spot this year. Don’t forget that Chicago has already lost games to Atlanta and Green Bay which could come back as a tie-breaker for any 10 – 6 team trying to get a wild card spot. A loss to Philadelphia would not help either since they are probably going to be one of the other teams vying for these same spots.

But how can the Bears even get these wins in the first place (or at least be less sucky)? I am not sure that they can. Therefore I believe that the Bears need to start preparing for the future while in the present.

The following link is to a document I have drafted that puts all my thoughts and suggestions to answering this question down in black and white. I am not putting it into this post because it is too long. If you are interested or care, please open the separate PDF file and read away:

A Systematic Breakdown Of The 2009 Chicago Bears

Maybe the ideas in this document are asinine. But something needs to be done. Something needs to change.

2010 NFL Season - Week 10 Picks

Week 10 of the NFL season is here and the games now begin on Thursday every week.

For those of you complaining that you can’t watch the game because it is on the NFL Network, get over it. Get a different cable provider or go to a bar. You either want to see these games or you don’t. Simple as that.

Of course, you probably really don’t want to see tonight’s matchup of a 3 – 5 team hosting a 4 – 4 team, but there it is. It’s still football, and it’s still the only thing worth watching on TV.

What else would you do? Watch the NBA?

Dumbass.

Chicago at San Francisco:
I’m taking the Bears to win this game because I’m an even bigger dumbass than somebody who thinks the NBA is a great league.

In order to win, the Bears need to focus on stopping Frank Gore. Simple as that. The rest of the game would sort itself out if they can stop the running game. Problem is, the Bears have not been able to do that lately and are now giving up an average of 119 yards on the ground.

The offense needs to get going early and score points. If the Bears can get the score up early on the 49ers they will have to abandon the running game and rely on Alex Smith to win the game.

Atlanta at Carolina:
Atlanta wins this game and gets another notch under their belt in the closing weeks of the wild card race in the NFL. This is a division game so it won’t be an easy win, but the Falcons will win.

Tampa Bay at Miami:
Miami wins. The Buc’s win against the Packers last week was an aberration. They will not get it done on the road this week.

Detroit at Minnesota:
This has a feeling of a trap game all over it, but I am still going to take the Vikings over the lowly Lions this week. The Vikings are coming off a bye week and might have gotten fat and lazy with all of that time off while they reflect on the Super Bowl win they are already telling themselves is theirs.

Fat and lazy? Time to stack up on some Star Caps.

Jacksonville at NY Jets:
Jets win. I don’t like it, but I don’t see them losing to the Jaguars at home this week. I hate the Jets, so I would really like to see them lose. Especially at home. I want to see that jerk with the Jets fireman hat cry.

Cincinnati at Pittsburgh:
The Bengals are on a roll this season. They’ve beaten Baltimore twice and already beaten the Steelers once. That stops this Sunday. Steelers win at home and start to close the gap for the AFC North.

New Orleans at St. Louis:
C’mon. New Orleans is going to beat the living hell out of the Rams.

Buffalo at Tennessee:
Tennessee takes the win at home. Trent Edwards will be starting for the Bills this week, but they have no mo’ T.O.

Denver at Washington:
Denver gets exactly what it needs after two tough losses in a row coming out of their bye week: The Washington Redskins.

Kansas City at Oakland:
This game was a real toss-up for me. I have to give it to Oakland simply because they are at home.

Seattle at Arizona:
Arizona destroyed the Bears last week on the road. Now they play at home where they have not played as well this season. Arizona pulls a win against a reeling Seahawks team.

Dallas at Green Bay:
I know that the Packers are supposed to be invincible at Lambeau Field. Or at least that’s the myth. Bull. As in bull rush.

The Cowboys’ pass rush will make Aaron Rodgers wish Brett Favre was still in Green Bay. Matt Flynn better take some precautionary snaps with the first team this week because he may be going in before this game is over.

Romo continues his streak of owning the month of November as he gets ready to fall on his face in December. But it’s not December, yet.

Philadelphia at San Diego:
I really hate the San Diego Chargers. But they do play very well at home. The Eagles are falling apart along their offensive line, and that will not bode well in a hostile environment like San Diego. Chargers win. Dammit.

New England at Indianapolis:
Clash of the Titans? What other nifty little things can the media come up with to name their promos for this game?

It actually is though. This is a matchup of two of the best quarterbacks to ever play the game. And we get to watch. If you are not watching this game on Sunday night, you are a communist and should be put against a wall.

Not watching this game will make Baby Jesus cry, and you don’t want that.

In what may be a preview of the AFC Championship game in January, I’m taking the Patriots for the win.

Baltimore at Cleveland:
Wow. I guess I’ll take Baltimore. Brady Quinn gets the nod to start this week, but who knows? If Ray Lewis and Ed Reed have anything to say about it, the Browns might have to put Derek Anderson in after they take Quinn off the field on a stretcher.

2010 NFL Season - Week 08 Results

Well, I can really pick ‘em, huh? I went 7 – 6 this week. With totals like that, I should have my own segment on ESPN. About the only bright spot is that I can claim that I am right more often than not. Not an exceptionally shiny and bright spot.

A lot of these games really could have gone either way. Who could have really made an intelligent guess on whether the St. Louis Rams or the Detroit Lions would have won that game? They are both equally bad. The game could have gone either way. The same goes for some of the other games.

And on the opposite end of the spectrum, Denver was on a hot streak, but the Ravens put their bye week to good use and came out firing with both barrels.

About the only game I missed on that was a shocker to me was the Arizona Cardinals’ loss to the Carolina Panthers. Last year the Cardinals were terrible on the road. This year, they are terrible at home. I don’t think anyone can tell which team is going to take the field when the Cardinals play.

But a loss is a loss. I picked them to win, and they did not.

Oh, and to all of those fantasy owners out there who are wondering what the hell is going on with Larry Fitzgerald’s lack of production this year, look no further. There are two truths that will make all of that clear.

The first is that most teams are using a lot more double coverage on Fitzgerald than they did last year.

The second, and possibly most relevant point, is that I drafted Fitzgerald in two fantasy leagues this year. Of course his production is going to suck.

My apologies to everyone who drafted Larry this year, the Cardinals’ fans, the organization, Larry’s mom, any pets he might own… Basically, everyone.

I can’t promise that I won’t draft him again next year, but we’ll have to wait and see.

One bright spot for Larry though is that he is playing against the Bears this week. If anyone can help him get going again with a huge game, it will be the woeful Bears defense.

2010 NFL Season - Week 05 Picks

All the games for Week 05 seem pretty straightforward. This probably means that this is going to be the week of the “upset special” in the NFL. But I am still going with the straight forward picks for the week.

Cleveland at Buffalo:
This is a perfect example of a possible upset. I think Buffalo needs to watch out for Cleveland. I have a feeling that Cleveland will Buffalo harder than expected by most (not that Buffalo is especially good), but I am still going to take Buffalo for the win this week.

Some other possible “upsets” in the making are Kansas City, Atlanta, Denver, and Tennessee. These should be some pretty good games, and I’m definitely going to be holding my breath for the outcome.